Last week, venerable fuchsia-haired doyenne
of fashion Dame Zandra Rhodes threw open the doors to her salon to the public
for her annual Christmas pop-up – and I attended on Thursday 28 November with my
glamourpuss German friend Anne Kathrin!
For the uninitiated, Rhodes resides in
the palatial “Rainbow Penthouse” above the bright orange Fashion and TextileMuseum in Bermondsey. Every time I attend an exhibit there, I wonder, Is Zandra
at home? Can I pop up, say Hi and check out the view from her terrace? Well,
reader, I finally got up there! Here’s my scene report! (The event was rammed with people but I did manage to snap some photos!).
/ Life-size cardboard figure of Zandra Rhodes in the corner. /
/ Caftans. Caftans. CAFTANS! Rhodes is of course synonymous with filmy, float-y bedazzled chiffon caftans. /
/ Pop art portrait of Rhodes in hallway to her powder room. /
/ Decor in Zandra Rhodes' corridor. /
/ Diva summit meeting: Anne Kathrin with Dame Zandra Rhodes. By the way, Rhodes is standing in this pic - she is diminutive! Must be about 4'11"! /
/ Me in front of Zandra Rhodes' wall of faux Warhol portraits! /
Recently watched: Rent-A-Cop (1987). When
Burt Reynolds and Liza Minnelli were originally teamed for the 1975 film Lucky
Lady, the result was a notorious and expensive mega-flop. So, I could kiss on
the lips whoever approved reuniting the duo for crime thriller / romantic
comedy hybrid Rent-A-Cop, the acme of gleefully enjoyable 1980s schlock.
When a police sting operation goes
horrifically wrong, gruff tough-as-nails Detective Tony Church (Reynolds) joins
forces with kooky free-spirited escort girl Della Roberts (Minnelli). Della,
you see, witnessed the carnage and is the sole person who can identify masked
gunman Adam "Dancer" Booth (played by James Remar. Sex and the City
fans will recognise him as Samantha Jones’ on-off boyfriend Richard Wright.
Remar also made his share of good movies, like The Warriors, Cruising (both
1979) and Drugstore Cowboy (1989)). But not if Dancer kills her first! Or, as Rent-A-Cop's tagline exclaims “There’s a killer on the loose and the lady is
the target.”
Inevitably – after some wacky hi-jinks - the
sparring odd couple of Tony and Della gradually fall in love. Aside from a
cameo appearance in The Muppets Take Manhattan, this represents Minnelli’s
first screen role after a gap of five years following her highly publicized
stint at the Betty Ford Clinic (her previous major part was Arthur in 1981).
Awash in sequins and mugging furiously, this is certainly Minnelli at her most
“Minnelli”. Della’s sex work is depicted as a wholesome TV sitcom-friendly lark
(she offers her johns the gamut of “his mommy, Little Bo-Peep, or Helga the
Bitch Goddess”. It should be noted that the same year, Minnelli’s peer Barbra
Streisand also unconvincingly played a high-price prostitute in Nuts).
Anyway, Rent-A-Cop abounds with
“what-the-fuck?” moments: Dancer inexplicably performs a sweaty homoerotic
Flashdance-style number in front of a mirror. A bewigged drag queen at a
nightclub accosts Della with “I love your muff!” Guest star Dionne Warwick
portrays Della’s madam. Weirdly, Rent-A-Cop is set in Chicago and exteriors
were shot there but the interiors were filmed in Rome’s Cinecittà Studios. And
the screenplay was written by Michael Blodgett – best-remembered by cult cinema
fans as hunky Lance Rock in the 1970 Russ Meyer sexploitation classic Beyond the
Valley of the Dolls! Reynolds and Minnelli were both nominated for the 1988
Golden Raspberry Awards for Worst Actor and Worst Actress (Minnelli won).
Further reading: the Cranky Lesbian blog’s shrewdand in-depth analysis. She quotes Reynolds' not very chivalrous but frank
recollection on acting opposite Minnelli: “She’s not the easiest person in the
world to act with. She’s never quite with you. It’s like she’s reading
something somewhere off-camera. Yet she’s amazing as a live performer.”
