25 July 2012 Dr Sketchy Set List

Kim Novak's Pussy: Kim Novak and Siamese companion in the 1958 film Bell, Book and Candle

For this Dr Sketchy, it was my first time back at The Royal Vauxhall Tavern in over a month. (The last time was 13 June 2012). The two guest performers / models were red-hot burlesque artistes on the ascent (and Dr Sketchy veterans) Slinky Sparkles and Choco Lat the Extraordinaire. Unfortunately, it was also a night of mondo technical glitches run amok!

Funnily enough, initially things were all smoothly functioning, organised and efficient. For once, I managed to sort out the stage lights myself, like a proper grown-up. The cordless microphone for the emcee was tested and ready to go. Choco Lat had arrived early, sound checked her CD and rehearsed one of her numbers (she did two). Then Slinky arrived and informed me the music for her number was on her iPod rather than burnt onto a CD. This always makes my heart sink: the scope for things going wrong when you’re grappling with someone’s unfamiliar iPod is high (my own iPod is the third generation shuffle – a completely different kettle of fish). And also, the volume on them is usually just never loud enough. Worryingly, when I tried to test the audio for Slinky’s iPod, I was getting no sound coming out of the decks at all. Eventually I called over The Royal Vauxhall Tavern’s manager and we both spent some sweaty, anxious moments trying to coax audio out of her iPod with no success. Finally, he had to call someone not on duty that night to work out what we were doing wrong! (Something to do with: the red light was on, when it should have been the green light. I must remember that!). When we finally got Slinky’s music resolved it felt like we'd averted a crisis. But there was more to come ...

(I’ve mentioned before that the decks at The RVT are the most complex of anywhere I’ve ever DJ’d. They really do look like the control panels of a helicopter and I have no idea what 60% of the buttons and knobs actually do. They’re really intended for dance DJs who beat mix, and obviously the venue is also used for full-scale performance art, cabaret and theatrical productions. My friend Christopher Raymond was there that night and he’d never been in the RVT's DJ booth before. Looking at the decks, he said they made him feel like Karen Black in Airport 1975 – the one where she plays the hysterical, panic-stricken stewardess who has to land the plane herself when the pilot dies of a heart attack mid-flight).

Behind the scenes, there was another drama brewing that I wasn’t even aware of. Ophelia Bitz was scheduled to emcee that night, but texted Dr Sketchy promoter (the glamorous and unflappable Clare Marie) at the last minute to say she couldn’t make it – which left Clare frantically trying to find a speedy replacement! Luckily, burlesque starlet Hotcake Kitty (who I’ve worked with at Dr Sketchy once before) stepped in and saved the day. The show was running late while this was being sorted out, but eventually when things were ready I gave Clare the cordless microphone to pass backstage to Kitty so show-time could start. Clare returned asking, "What’s wrong? The mic’s not working!" So I had to call over the long-suffering RVT manager again while we desperately tried to work out why there was suddenly no audio coming out of the mic we’d already sound checked earlier (and simultaneously keep DJ’ing)! That felt like it took ages and we were contemplating a mic-free night when finally it started working. Who knows why? We never got to the bottom of what happened there.

Later on, Slinky was due to go straight into her burlesque performance right after the break. Clare was standing next to me in the DJ booth. I’d noticed earlier the little battery symbol on Slinky’s iPod was indicating the battery was low. By now, just before her act, it was virtually dead! Clare swung into action, stretching the break out longer while she located a charger and we re-charged it as best we could – we only needed it to spark to life long enough for Slinky’s number and not die midway through! Mercifully, it worked: Hotcake Kitty announced Slinky, I hit “Play”, the iPod worked, and her number was absolutely seamless. By then I pounded back several pints of beer just to get my blood pressure back to normal. I had some friends in attendance that night and they said afterward no one in the audience was aware of any technical hitches going down, which was a relief. It actually felt exciting to salvage the night from all these potential disasters – it got the adrenaline pumping and kept me on my toes. It was a triumph against adversity!

Musically, I began with some finger snapping noir-ish and art-y No Wave / post-punk skronk courtesy of Snatch (aka Patti Palladin and Judy Nylon), death kitten / harridan Lydia Lunch and Chet Baker of punk James Chance, eased into some exotica and then luxuriated in full-blown, greasy vintage sleaze for the rest of the night. For Slinky’s poses, I decided to go for a different approach rather than the usual grinding tittyshaking instrumentals. Slinky’s image recalls classic 1950s Hollywood blonde actresses like Marilyn Monroe – but also haunting and enigmatic "Lavender Blonde" Kim Novak. I tried to opt for eerie, delicate music that evoked the idea of the archetypal Alfred Hitchcock cool blonde: pristine and poised on the outside, roiling with neuroses on the inside. Think of ice maidens like Grace Kelly, or Tippi Hedren in The Birds and Marnie. Hell, January Jones as the frosty, troubled trophy wife Betty Draper in Mad Men qualifies as an honorary modern equivalent of a Hitchcock Blonde-type, as does Catherine Deneuve in Belle de Jour. And, towering above them all is the fragile and doomed Novak in Vertigo. The latter choice is actually quite timely: on 2 August, Vertigo was officially declared “the greatest film of all time” (usurping Citizen Kane) in a poll by The British Film Institute’s Sight and Sound magazine. Anyway, the section of music between “Moon Mist” and Chet Baker’s “Petit Fleur” was for Slinky’s poses. Francoise Hardy (crooning in wispy German), Jennifer Miro of the Nuns, Marilyn Monroe and film noir siren- turned-chanteuse Lizabeth Scott represented the gloomy, conflicted voices in Slinky’s head.

Kim Novak in Alfred Hitchcock's Vertigo (1958)

I’ve almost certainly mentioned this before, but having Clare Marie, Slinky, Choco Lat and I all assembled in one room is a bit of a mini-What Katie Did reunion. All three of us used to work at the deluxe faux-vintage lingerie emporium in Portobello when it first opened its doors in 2007. None of us work there now, but we were the original “dream team” in the early days. Clare used to be the manager, I was the semi-regular “Saturday Boy” and Slinky and Choco Lat were sales assistants.


The way we were! Photo taken at the in-store What Katie Did Christmas party in 2008. Left to right: me, Slinky Sparkles, Clare, Choco Lat and What Katie Did founder/ proprietor Katie Halford

Slinky and Choco Lat are consistently amazing performers. Sadly, I haven’t come across any photos taken on the night (if I find any I’ll add them later), but someone filmed a video of Choco Lat’s dazzling first number (a fan dance). If you watch carefully, you catch a glimpse of me tip toeing from the DJ booth to the men’s room during her act! (One of the advantages of DJ’ing at The RVT is that the men’s room is conveniently situated right next to the DJ booth!).



Shopping for Clothes - Snatch
I Love How You ... Lydia Lunch
Town without Pity - James Chance
Simba - Les Baxter
Virgenes del Sol - Yma Sumac
Beauty is Only Skin Deep - Robert Mitchum
Cocktails for Two - Cliff Duphiney
Vesuvius - The Revels
Madness - The Rhythm Rockers
Don't Blame it On Me - Ike and Tina Turner
Pass the Hatchet - Roger and The Gypsies
Baby Blues Rock - Carl Simpson
Oo Ba La Baby - Mamie Van Doren
Good and Bad - The Gauchos
The Mexican - The Fentones
Jim Dandy - Sara Lee and The Spades
Elle est terrible - Johnny Hallyday
When I Get Low I Get High - Florence Joelle
Don't Be Cruel - Bill Black Combo
Club Delight - Jack Jolly
I Ain't in the Mood - Helen Humes
This Thing Called Love - Esquerita
Wiped Out - The Escorts
Love Potion # 9 - Nancy Sit
Scorpion - Jimmy McConville and The Shamrocks
It Ain't to Play With - Sheryl Crowley and Lorenzo Holden's Orchestra
Blockade - The Rumblers
Fever - The Huntsmen
Work Song - Nina Simone
Strollin' After Dark - The Shades
Miss Irene - Ginny Kennedy
Beavershot - The Hollywood Hurricanes
My Goodness - X
Last Night - Lula Reed
Night Walk - The Swingers
Chicken Grabber - The Nite Hawks
Kruschev Twist - Melvin Gayle
Peter Gunn Locomotion - The Delmonas
Peter Gunn Twist - The Jesters
Tall Cool One - The Wailers
Run - Jeri Sothern
Moon Mist - The Out Islanders
Traume - Francoise Hardy
Lazy - The Nuns
Lazy - Marilyn Monroe
Can't Get Out of This Mood - Lizabeth Scott
Petit Fleur - Chet Baker
Hand Clappin' Time - The Fabulous Raiders
Beat Party - Ritchie and The Squires
Suey - Jayne Mansfield
Don't You Feel My Leg - Blue Lu Barker
C'est Si Bon - Eartha Kitt
Shangri-La - Spikes Jones New Band
The Good Life - Ann-Margret
Boss - The Rumblers
The Whip - The Frantics
No Good Lover - Mickey and Sylvia
Devil in Disguise - Elvis Presley
Mighty Good Love - Big Maybelle
The Girl Can't Help It - Little Richard
Chop Suey Rock'N'Roll - The Instrumentals
The Bee - The Sentinels

18 April 2012 Dr Sketchy DJ Set List

/ She wore a teeny weeny itsy bitsy zebra print bikini: Jayne Mansfield. Why don't people wear zebra print more often? /

This was my first Dr Sketchy since getting back from two weeks in US (I got back on Saturday 14 April after going to the annual Viva Las Vegas rockabilly weekender, followed by a few days in San Francisco), and have to admit it felt like a bit tepid this time. Which was certainly not the fault of the stellar line-up of performers: homme du monde Dusty Limits on emcee duties, platinum blonde Monroe-a-like showgirl Slinky Sparkles and kooky newcomer, Australian starlet Georgina Ruby. Lately we’ve been on fire, but this Dr Sketchy didn’t sell out (although it didn’t exactly look sparsely attended from the DJ booth and to their credit the crowd seemed open and enthusiastic).

I’d spent a bomb on CDs at Amobea Records in San Francisco (my favourite record store in the world. And when I say “spent a bomb”, my credit card statement is giving me anxiety attacks), which I was keen to play. One of the CDs was a mondo exotica Tiki compilation (that’s why you might see more Les Baxter and Martin Denny than usual, as well as Yma Sumac’s sublime “Wimoweh”), but don’t think I managed to integrate it very well into things. In fact musically I think I was incoherent as hell. It was one of those nights where musically it just didn't gel for me. Let’s blame the murderous post-US jetlag I’m still suffering from (it takes me at least a week or two for my body clock to re-adjust to UK time! I was feeling zombified with exhaustion all week) and drinking pints of lager on an empty stomach (I went to the venue straight from work and The Royal Vauxhall Tavern’s kitchen has temporarily stopped serving food. I was depending on a bowl of their chips to line my stomach with!).

One of the evening’s most disconcerting touches was the sleeping guy. He looked like what we in the know would call a “bear.” He came in alone, ordered a pint of beer, picked one of the best seats in the venue – and then snoozed through pretty much the entire show. At one point Clare Marie (Dr Sketchy’s glamazon promoter) was standing next to me in the DJ booth and I pointed him out to her. Unruffled, she just shrugged and said he paid his entry fee so he could sleep if he wanted to. (Midway through, he woke up, looked confused by his surroundings and wandered out). Strange!

For Georgina’s poses I cranked up the kitsch factor and sleazy instrumentals. With Dr Sketchy veteran Slinky I always go heavy on cooing Hollywood sex kittens. Obviously playing a Marilyn Monroe track is obligatory, but I could skip one by Jayne Mansfield this time because Slinky already used a song by Jayne as part of her burlesque number (“Too Hot to Handle” in case you’re interested). I also explored a sultry and melancholy blue mood with a trio of ballads by three quintessential chanteuses: Nina Simone, Eartha Kitt and Juliette Greco.

/ Georgina Ruby: Doesn't she look a bit like 1980s New Wave crackpot Lene Lovich here? /

/ Slinky Sparkles /

/ Pin-up come to life: Slinky Sparkles evoking Betty Grable /

(All photos by the talented Andrew Hickinbottom)


/ Fragment of La Mansfield bumping, twitching and pouting her way through "Too Hot to Handle" /



/ Glimpse of the breathtakingly beautiful young Juliette Greco (in trademark stark Morticia Addams black) singing "Bonjour Tristesse" in 1958. Trust me: the original French lyrics are much better than the trite English ones! /

Misirlou - Martin Denny
Monkey Bird - The Revels
Champagne Taste - Eartha Kitt
Witchcraft - Joe Grave and The Diggers
Los Cigarillos - Serge Gainsbourg
Hot Toddy - Julie London
Fever - Richard Marino and His Orchestra
Mess of Blues - Elvis Presley
All You Had to Do Was Tell Me - Ann-Margret
Oui je veux - Johnny Hallyday
Sea of Love - The Earls of Suave
Night Scene - The Rumblers
Cheesecake - Nite Sounds
Town without Pity - James Chance
The Mexican - The Fentones
Tequila - Stan Kenton and His Orchestra
Wimoweh - Yma Sumac
Not Me - Robert Mitchum
Go Calypso - Mamie Van Doren
Don't Be Cruel - Bill Black Combo
Made You - Adam Faith (Beat Girl soundtrack)
Intoxica - The Centurions (Pink Flamingos soundtrack)
Sweetiepie - Eddie Cochran
The Swag - Link Wray (Pink Flamingos soundtrack)
Jim Dandy - Sara Lee and The Spades
Pass the Hatchet - Roger and The Gypsies
Baby Blues Rock - Carl Simpson
Tonight You Belong to Me - Patience and Prudence
Beaver Shot - The Periscopes
Bewildered - Shirley and Lee
Strolling After Dark - The Shades
Caterpillar Crawl - The Strangers
Boots - Nero and The Gladiators
It's Legal - Shirley Anne Field (Beat Girl soundtrack)
Cherry Pink - Bill Black Combo
Caravan - 80 Drums Around the World
Come By Sunday - Diana Dors
Tall Cool One - The Wailers
Drummin' Up a Storm - Sandy Nelson
Lookie There, Ain't She Pretty - Bill Haley and His Comets
Je Me Donne A Qui Me Plait - Brigitte Bardot
Scorpion - The Carnations
One Mint Julep - Sarah Vaughan
Begin the Beguine - Billy Fury
Jungle Drums - Earl Bostic
Mambo Baby - Ruth Brown
Boss - The Rumblers
Whiplash - The Shells
Anytime - Bill Black Combo
Willow Weep for Me - Nina Simone
Solitude - Eartha Kitt
Bonjour Tristesse - Juliette Greco
Petit Fleur - Chet Baker
Do It Again - Marilyn Monroe
Blues in My Heart - John Buzon Trio
Harlem Nocturne - Martin Denny
You're My Thrill - Dolores Gray
You Beautiful Doll - Nancy Sinatra
Drums A G-Go - The Hollywood Persuaders
Thirteen Men - Ann-Margret
The Beast - Milt Buckner
Deep Dark Secret - Lizabeth Scott
Hand Clapping Time - The Fabulous Raiders
Beat Party - Ritchie and The Squires
Uptown to Harlem - Johnny Thunders and Patti Paladin
Don't Blame it On Me - Ike and Tina Turner
I'm Not A Juvenile Delinquent - Frankie Lymon and The Teenagers



Next time: an update on Lobotomy Room, and a full scene report on Viva Las Vegas and San Francisco!

10 March 2012 Dr Sketchy Set List

/ When Marilyn met Marlene: Monroe and Dietrich photographed circa the mid-1950s. Dietrich (born in 1901) could have comfortably been Monroe’s mother (Marilyn was born in 1926; Dietrich’s own daughter, Maria Riva, was born in 1924), not that you’d know it judging by this photo. Dietrich, of course, was a “joyous(ly) bisexual Good Time Charlene” (description courtesy of Kenneth Anger’s Hollywood Babylon). I forget the source now, but I remember reading an account of Dietrich being at a Hollywood party when Marilyn arrived late and already tipsy. Monroe was wearing a white fur coat, and there was a smear of her bright red lipstick on the collar. Dietrich told a friend afterwards that she found it “maddeningly erotic.” I’ve always remembered that expression: maddeningly erotic /

For this relaxed, enjoyable (and sold-out!) afternoon Dr Sketchy at The Old Queen’s Head, the performers / models were burlesque starlets Slinky Sparkles and Emerald Fontaine, with the raucous Ophelia Bitz (the Tallulah Bankhead du nos jours) on emcee duties. “Release the repressed sexual urges you’ve been holding back all week ...” Ophelia urged the audience, only to later accuse them of “leering and touching yourselves under the table.”

/ Ms Bitz and I. I'd been sweating to the oldies behind the DJ booth. Ophelia is placing her hand to cover my arm pit sweat patch. What a woman! Photo by Clare Marie /

Emerald and Slinky certainly facilitated the leering and self-touching. I’d never worked with raven-haired, bullet-bra'd, pencil skirted and hardboiled bad girl Emerald before. Her act was very much a tribute to the cinema of trash auteur John Waters (Ophelia introduced her as “John Waters’ wet dream”), which obviously won my instant approval. The music for her burlesque number was “Jungle Drums” by Earl Bostick (from the Cry-baby soundtrack); it started with a lollipop-sucking Emerald as a hitchhiking runaway trying to thumb a ride, holding a sign emblazoned “Baltimore” (think teenaged delinquent Dawn Davenport in Female Trouble running away from home, or sulky Traci Lords in Cry-baby). For her poses, I happily wallowed in songs from John Waters’ soundtracks (his sleazy musical selections have always been a huge inspiration for me anyway) from films like Pink Flamingos, Cry-baby and A Dirty Shame, as well as tracks that sound like they could be from a John Waters film.

 / She's got it, ooh baby she's got it: Emerald Fontaine photographed by Andrew Hickinbottom (all photos from the day are by him unless indicated) /

Later, platinum blonde Marilyn Monroe lookalike Slinky Sparkles did a spectacular fan dance routine. For her poses, I raised the tone a bit with twinkly cocktail music cooed by sex kittens like Marilyn Monroe (playing at least a few tracks by Marilyn is de rigueur when Slinky models), Julie London, Ann-Margret, Diana Dors and Jayne Mansfield.

/ Series of photos of Ophelia Bitz and I ogling Slinky Sparkles in action. Photos by Andrew Hickinbottom /

Otherwise, a loose “chicken”-related theme cropped up (remember the scene in Pink Flamingos where Cookie and Crackers have sex and a live chicken gets involved in the action? I’m sure you’re still as traumatised by it as I am. Anyway, the song used in that sequence is “Chicken Grabber” by The Nite Hawks) and also a Latino / Mexican theme (which perhaps climaxed with Eartha Kitt’s berserk version of “La Bamba”, from her Eartha canta en Espanol album). As is my wont, I also went on a gynaecological musical journey to the centre of a girl with a series of single-entendre "pussy" songs (from Faye Richmonde's "My Pussy Belongs to Daddy" to "Can Your Pussy Do the Dog?" by The Cramps).

/ Emerald Fontaine and Slinky Sparkles together. Photo by Leigh Van Der Byl /

Not to get nostalgic on your asses, but I know both Slinky and Clare Marie (Dr Sketchy’s imperturbable promoter / stage manager) in the first place because we all worked together at deluxe faux vintage lingerie emporium What Katie Did when its London boutique first opened in 2007. (They worked there full-time; I was just the occasional “Saturday boy” who worked the till, ran to the post office, climbed ladders and yes, occasionally, when necessary strapped semi-naked women into a corset with trembling hands). None of us work there now (although Slinky still regularly models for What Katie Did), but if it hadn’t been for my brief but fun stint there, I would never have met Clare Marie, who went on to promote Dr Sketchy and helped instigate my DJ’ing career (now you know who to blame! The reason I got my Saturday boy position is because way back in the 1990s, Katie Halford, What Katie Did’s founder and boss lady, and I used to work together for a fetish mail order company – but that’s a whole other sordid can of worms).

Anyway, What Katie Did continues to go from strength to strength, and recently even opened a “sister” boutique in Los Angeles. On Sunday 4 March 2012, What Katie Did held an in-store party and fashion show to launch their Spring/Summer 2012 range. It was all very chi chi and frou frou: gin cocktails served in vintage tea cups, chocolate cupcakes branded with the WKD logo, etc. The party was a blast. Here’s just a handful of pics (by me, except for the one I’m in, which I swiped from Facebook!).



/ Surrounded by bullet bras and suspender belts – my natural habitat! Left to right: Therese (Swedish rockabilly, my George & Dragon drinking buddy – we enable each other!), me, Katie Halford herself (the founder of What Katie Did), and Katie’s adorable daughter Poppy. Expert bartender Poppy poured out the drinks into vintage tea cups without spilling a drop. I drink gin out of a tea cup so daintily /



/ This photo is a bit of who's who of burlesque / cabaret starlets on the rise: Sophia St Villier (who'd actually modelled in the What Katie Did lingerie fashion show earlier), Ava Iscariot (both Sophia and Ava are frequent Dr Sketchy models and performers) and Luna DeLovely /



/ Kayee and Therese having a cigarette break outside /

See more photos from the party (and the actual lingerie in the fashion show) here

Finally: speaking of Sophia St Villier, she recently did a smouldering photo session inspired by the paintings of Tamara De Lempicka, which is well worth checking out here. NSFW alert!


Make the World Go Away - Timi Yuro
Torture - Kris Jensen
Stop and Listen - Mickey and Ludella
The Fire of Love - Jody Reynolds
Riding By - The Majestics
Oop Shoop - Big John and The Buzzards
Matilda, Matilda - Robert Mitchum
When I Get Low, I Get High - Florence Joelle and Her Kiss of Fire
I Put A Spell on You - Screamin' Jay Hawkins
Give Me Your Lov - Ike and Tina Turner
Rock It - The Rockin' Brothers
Screwdriver - Luchi
Chicken Boogie - Ralph Marterie
Kiss Me Honey Honey - The Delmonas
Souvenir, Souvenir - Johnny Hallyday
Salamander - Mamie Van Doren
Blockade - The Rumblers
Ring of Fire - The Earls of Suave
La Bamba - Eartha Kitt
The Mexican - The Fentones
Surfin' Snow Matador - Jan Davis
Eso - Conjunto TNT
Chihuahua - Mina
Besame Mucho - Betty Reilly
Chicken Talk - Yma Sumac
Love Potion # 9 - Nancy Sit
The Girls in Paris - Lee Hazlewood
Night Scene - The Rumblers
I Would if I Could - Ruth Brown
A Cruise to the Moon - Lydia Lunch
Sweetie Pie - Eddie Cochran
Boss - The Rumblers
I'm a Bad, Bad Girl - Little Esther
Save It - Mel Robbins
Hand Clapping Time - The Fabulous Raiders
Drummin' Up A Storm - Sandy Nelson
Cry-baby - The Honey Sisters
Let's Go Sexin' - James Intveld
Chicken Hawk - The Nite Hawks
No Good Lover - Mickey and Sylvia
Uptown to Harlem - Johnny Thunders and Patti Paladin
The Flirt - Shirley and Lee
Roll with Me Henry - Etta James
Jim Dandy - LaVerne Baker
Lucille - Little Richard
Maybe Baby - Esquerita
Kruschev Twist - Melvin Gayle
8 Ball - The Hustlers
Fever - Nancy Sit
Wiped-Out - The Escorts
La valse des si - Juliette Greco
Mondo Moodo - The Earls of Suave
Harlem Nocturne - The Viscounts
Kiss - Marilyn Monroe
A Kiss and a Cuddle - Diana Dors
Love Me or Leave Me - Lena Horne
Go Slow - Julie London
Slowly - Ann-Margret
Little Things Mean a Lot - Jayne Mansfield
Two Little Girls from Little Rock - Marilyn Monroe and Jane Russell
Bikini with No Top on the Top - Mamie Van Doren and June Wilkinson
My Pussy Belongs to Daddy - Faye Richmonde
Sweet Little Pussycat - Andre Williams
The Pussycat Song - Connie Vannett
Can Your Pussy Do the Dog? The Cramps
Boots - Nero and The Gladiators
Beat Party - Ritchie and The Squires
Wondrous Place - Billy Fury
Witchcraft - Elvis Presley
Early Every Morning - Dinah Washington
Love Me or Leave Me - Nina Simone
Let's Get Lost - Chet Baker

18 May 2011 Dr Sketchy Set List

/ Jayne Mansfield with a totally impractical surf board /

This was my first post-Viva Las Vegas Rockabilly Weekender Dr Sketchy. I scored some great CDs in Vegas: a Ruth Brown greatest hits package and two wonderfully seedy compilations of freaky rockabilly and garage punk oddities -- Twisted Tales from the Vinyl Wastelands volume 8: Please Don’t Go Topless Mother and You Better Believe It 1955-1969: White Trash Rockers! Both of these more than live up to the promise of their lurid titles. I also recently acquired volume three of the Las Vegas Grind titty shaker series, which represent the bedrock of my DJ sets. It was about time I’d refreshed my music and I drew heavily on these new CDs at this Dr Sketchy. Music this sleazy and abrasive is like oxygen to me.

The night (which was at The Royal Vauxhall Tavern this time) featured Dusty Limits as emcee and two great performers / models: Trixi Tassels and Chocolat (aka Ruka. Alongside Dr Sketchy promoter Clare Marie, she's one of the proprietors of red-hot new lingerie emporium Sugarlesque). Unfortunately poor Chocolat’s performance occasioned the worst technical glitch of my DJ’ing career thus far! Both Trixi and Chocolat gave me their CDs of music for their acts, I tested them beforehand (as per usual) and both worked just fine. After the break, Dusty was to introduce Chocolat, I'd have her song cued, and she’d go straight into her act. Dusty announced her; I pressed “play” and ... nothing. I frantically yanked the CD out and tried another CD player and – still nothing! And then a message I’d never seen before came up on the little monitor: Disc Error! I was well and truly bugging out (my blood pressure was exploding, sweat beads were popping) and the crowd was murmuring impatiently wondering what the hell was going on. Luckily these people are total pros and swung into action: Dusty brought Trixi back out to pose some more and keep things moving while we sorted out the music crisis. Rising burlesque starlet Slinky Sparkles was in attendance and worked out with Chocolat backstage some potential alternative songs for her performance – except I had none of them! But Slinky herself had one of the songs on her iPod. We were able to hook up her iPod to the decks and use it for Chocolat’s number. Phew! I’m forever in Slinky’s debt! It was a relief to get everything back on track, and Chocolat’s act was great: she came out covered in balloons and gradually popped them one by one with a cigarette.

/ Sophia Loren sneaks a peek at Jayne Mansfield /

Anyway, in a sense the night was my delayed tribute to Jayne Mansfield. (Although in truth every time I DJ is a bit of a valentine to Jayne Mansfield, anyway – just like it is for other heroes like Esquerita, Little Richard and Eartha Kitt). I’d read the month before that Jayne’s birthday is 19 April -- so if she hadn’t been killed (aged 34) in her 1967 car crash, Mansfield would have turned 78 this year. Because she’s been dead for so long, Mansfield feels like a distant figure from a bygone age but it’s certainly feasible she could still be alive: her contemporary Elizabeth Taylor just died in March aged 79; Sophia Loren and Brigitte Bardot are both alive and well at 77. It’s fascinating to speculate what Mansfield would be like if she’d lived to see old age -- her personal life and career seemed to be circling the drain when she died. Maybe she'd be like her closest living equivalent Mamie van Doren, who's still posing for softcore nude photoshoots and partying at the Playboy Mansion aged 80. I’m not sure if anyone even noticed, but to honour her I played “I Walk like Jayne Mansfield” by the wondrous all-girl Japanese surf band 5,6,7,8s and then “That Makes It” by La Mansfield herself. RIP, Jayne.

/ Two fun couples: Mamie van Doren and date. Mickey Hargitay (Mr Universe 1955) and Jayne Mansfield. Jayne's eyes look like they're clocking Mamie's cleavage /




Shame the audio quality is so muffled

Otherwise: when Ruka / Chocolat models at Dr Sketchy I tend to go heavy on the great rhythm & blues divas: Dinah Washington, Little Esther, Eartha purring “Mack the Knife". I ended things on a defiant note with the wounded / wounding “I Hold No Grudge” by the angrily politicised High Priestess of Soul Nina Simone. “I’m the kind of people you can step on for a little while,” she snarls. “But when I call it quits, baby, that’s it! I’m the kind of people you can hurt once in a while. But crawling just ain’t my style!” Sing it, sister! Belt it out! (The 1966 song is by the great Angelo Badalamenti, long before he became David Lynch’s soundtrack composer. You can already discern the signature ominous / brooding 1950s Cool Jazz keyboard sound he’d later bring to the music for the likes of Blue Velvet and Twin Peaks, an atmospheric sound so essential to Lynch's cinematic vision).

Heartbreakin' Special - Duke Larson
Leave Married Women Alone - Jimmy Cavallo
Whisper Your Love - The Phantom
Teardrops from My Eyes - Ruth Brown
The Fire of Love - Jody Reynolds
The Flower of My Heart - Sparkle Moore
De Castrow - Jaybee Wasden
Love Letters - Ike and Tina Turner
Khrushchev Twist - Melvin Gayle
The Sneak - Jimmy Oliver
Out of Limits - The Marketts
Stampede - The Scarlets
Snow Surfin' Matador - Jan Davis
Scorpion - The Carnations
Vesuvius - The Revels
Rockin' Bongos - Chaino
Pas C'est Chanson - Johnny Halliday
Because of Love - Billy Fury
Go Calypso - Mamie van Doren
Rum and Coca Cola - Wanda Jackson
Try It No More - Genbe Marcum
I Just Don't Understand - Ann-Margret
Fool I Am - Pat Ferguson
The Chase - Chaino
Hillbilly Surfer - Whitey White
Oh Baby - Esquerita
Nightscene - The Rumblers
Cherry Pink - Bill Black's Combo
Drive In - The Jaguars
Womp Womp - Freddy and The Heartaches
Bad, Bad Girl - Little Esther
I Walk Like Jayne Mansfield - The 5,6,7,8s
That Makes It - Jayne Mansfield
Beat Party - Ritchie & The Squires
She's My Witch - The Earls of Suave
The Coo - Wayne Cochran
Rigor Mortis - The Gravestone Four
Devil in Disguise - Elvis Presley
The Bee - The Sentinels
L'il Lil - Mel Dorsey
Mambo Baby - Ruth Brown
She Wants to Mambo - Johnny Thunders and Patti Paladin
Anasthasia - Bill Smith Combo
Go Slow - Julie London
You're Crying - Dinah Washington
Aged and Mellow Blues - Little Esther
Crawlin' - The Untouchables
Mack the Knife - Eartha Kitt
Is You Is Or Is You Ain't My Baby? Ann Richards
My Daddy Rocks Me - Mae West
Happy, Happy Birthday Baby - The Tune Weavers (in honour of Dr Sketchy Clare Marie's birthday)
I Was Born to Cry - Dion
Begin the Beguine - Billy Fury
La Javanaise - Juliette Greco
You Can't Stop Her - Bobby Marchan
The Girl Can't Help It - Little Richard
I Hold No Grudge - Nina Simone

When Mansfield’s Hollywood career fizzled out by the late 1950s, she resorted to low-budget European films – like ultra-obscure 1963 German film Heimweh nach St. Pauli (known as Homesick for St Pauli in North America). Mansfield’s speaking voice is dubbed by a German actress, but the singing in the musical numbers is obviously all her! The film looks irresistibly trashy – dig Mansfield’s cotton candy bouffant wig. I love it when she serenades the sailors. I’ve been reassured by German friends her accent and pronunciation are appalling.






Update! It turns out there was a journalist in attendence at this Dr Sketchy, and he wrote a great article online about it. Some great photos of Chocolat in action in her balloon costume.

Las Vegas Grind! Viva Las Vegas 2011

Viva Las Vegas 2011 seemed to go by a blur! Maybe that’s the reason I took less good photos than usual. Less of my American friends went this year, which was a bit of a letdown. I caught brief glimpses of Satan's Angel and Dean Micetich of DiCE Magazine (aka the artist formerly known as Kid Rocker) but then never saw them again for rest of weekend. Missed Sweetpea’s Hootch and Smooch warm-up party on afternoon of Thursday. Didn’t make it into Double Down Saloon or Atomic Liquor and Cocktails (my two favourite Las Vegas dive bars. In fact Jim and I did make a special trek to go to the Double Down Saloon, but I neglected to bring my passport and the bouncer on the door wouldn’t let me in because I didn’t have ID to prove I was over 21! At my age!). Didn’t catch Big Elvis's lounge act this year (a sacrilege!). Didn’t catch either the burlesque showcase or the burlesque contest, even though my friend Sarah (aka Slinky Sparkles) was a contestant in the competition (the long queues to get in to both were extremely off-putting). Where the hell did the time go?!

/ After about a grand total of twelve and a half hours in an airplane, Sarah and Jim were gasping for a cigarette by the time we arrived in Vegas /

/ Sarah and I at The Orleans. Note her Vivienne Westwood handbag. It's genuine /

The highlights: Caught some great bands. Pachuco Josey y Los Diamantes. The Modern Don Juans. Los Straitjackets. Los Tiki Phantoms. (Yes, the future of rockabilly is Latino!). After Chuck Berry’s creaky and underwhelming performance in 2010 (Jim and I left after watching only three or four songs), I was wary of headliner Jerry Lee Lewis but the 75-year old rockabilly legend was in great voice and on stately / majestic form (even if he didn’t sing “Breathless”, my favourite song of his).

/ Closest thing I could get to a close-up of Jerry Lee Lewis performing at the car show /

Meeting Mistress of the Dark Elvira at the car show involved queuing in the baking sun for about 35 minutes and then buying wildly over-priced merchandise for the privilege of having my photo taken with her – but was well worth it to meet one of my teenaged idols. Elvira (aka Cassandra Peterson) was gracious and charming, and the woman is an ageless icon, revered by punks, rockabillies and Goths.

/ Elvira and I /

/ Close-up of Elvira: the photo is even better with me cropped-out! /

/ Present-day flame-haired veteran burlesque legend (and star of Teaserama) Tempest Storm at the car show /

/ Tempest Storm in the fifties /

Exploring the Charleston Antique Mall (a treasure trove of mid-century vintage kitsch) was fun. Was great seeing Jorge from Los Angeles (aka DJ Zorch) and his beautiful new girlfriend, albeit briefly. Finally meeting Sean Law! The pool parties with the surf band Aquasonics performing live every afternoon. For their sets they were joined onstage by Seattle burlesque starlet Miss Kitty Baby go-go dancing. Watching Kitty Baby (an escapee from a 1960s Russ Meyer film, with added tattoos) shake it like a Poloroid in the dreamy Vegas sunshine while drinking Pabst Blue Ribbon is a life-affirming experience: if the Viva Las Vegas weekender has a queen, it’s Miss Kitty Baby.

/ Me, Jim and Jorge (aka DJ Zorch from Los Angeles) /

/ Historic Meeting: Two Canadians Meet in Las Vegas! Sean Law and I /

/ Go, baby, go! Miss Kitty Baby in action, go-go dancing to the surf sounds of the Aquasonics /

/ Jim and Miss Kitty Baby: Note how the lurid colours of his Hawaiian shirt and her go-go dancer outfit coordinate beautifully /

Fittingly, one of the film selections on the flight back to London was the classic 1953 Marlon Brando juvenile delinquent / motorcycle gang film The Wild One. I hadn’t seen it since I was a teenager and before popping an Ambien and crashing out for most of the journey I made a point of watching it. By today’s standards some aspects of The Wild One may seem camp-y and dated, but it’s a tightly-constructed, energetically told and really enjoyable B-movie, and as a rockabilly fanatic it obviously holds a timeless fascination for me. For one thing, the film came out before rock’n’roll burst through, so it’s surprising when a smouldering and insolent young Brando swaggers into a cafe and fires up the jukebox, instead of a burst of twang-y rockabilly it emits ... jazz. (Frantic bebop jazz, but even still! No wonder the trailer refers to them as “jazzed-up hoodlums”). And the clothes Brando and his gang The Black Rebel Motorcycle Club wear are so covetable they had me virtually drooling. The black leather engineer boots, the perfect Levis with the perfect turn-ups, the t-shirts, the leather jackets, the caps, the sunglasses, the quiffs, the sideburns ... Brando and his gang remain the absolute visual / sartorial ideal for male rockabillies in the way that, say, Bettie Page or Mamie van Doren do for female rockabillies.

Anyway, roll on Viva Las Vegas 2012!

See more of my Viva Las Vegas 2011 photos on flickr

12 March 2011 Dr Sketchy Set List

Dorothy Malone demonstrating the Fifties bullet bra’d sweater girl look. Malone is one of the great unsung actresses from the fifties and should be immortal if only for her courageously lurid performance as the alcoholic nymphomaniac sexpot sister in Douglas Sirk’s irresistable 1956 melodrama Written on the Wind. Check out the scene where she unwittingly causes her own father’s death by dancing to frantic mambo music in lingerie in her bedroom. Death by Mambo! It's one of the greatest scenes in any film ever made! They don’t make ‘em like that anymore! (And when I say that, I mean films and actresses).

I don’t know if it’s because they’re held in the daytime (and therefore I wind up drinking beer in the daytime), or because it's on the weekend and I don't have to worry about being tired or hungover the next day, but the Saturday afternoon Dr Sketchy’s at The Old Queen’s Head tend to feel more mellow and laid-back. And the music I tend to play is probably more raucous and rockabilly-ish (punkier? Messier? Certainly louder) as a result.

For this Dr Sketchy the emcee was the vivacious hourglass-contoured Ophelia Bitz (always a blast to work with) and the sole model and performer was platinum blonde showgirl deluxe Slinky Sparkles (who I got to know years ago when I used to work with her at the What Katie Did boutique in Portobello). A burlesque starlet on the rise, Slinky recently got a great break: she’s made it into the finalists and will be participating in the burlesque competition at the annual Viva Las Vegas rockabilly weekender this April. We’re all really proud of her! I’ll be there (trust me, the knowledge am going to Las Vegas in April is one of the few things gluing me together at the moment) so can report back how she does in the competition – am sure the Americans will go berserk for her. Needless to say, when Slinky was posing I went full tilt boogie on sultry sex kitten tunes by the likes of Bardot, Eartha, Julie London, Jayne and Marilyn.

Snow Surfin' Matador - Jan Davis
Vesuvius - The Revels
Beat Generation - Mamie van Doren
Bop Pills - Macy "Skip" Skipper
The Hiccups - The Empallos
A Mess of Blues - Elvis Presley
Ain't That Lovin' You, Baby - The Earls of Suave
Intoxica - The Centurions
Love Potion # 9 - Nancy Sit
Fever - The Delmonas
Beaver Shot - The Periscopes
Your Love is Mine - Ike and Tina Turner
I Love the Life I Live - Esquerita
Directly from My Heart - Little Richard
Last Night - Lula Reed
Torture - Kris Jensen
Torture Rock - The Rockin' Belmarx
Beat Girl - Adam Faith (Beat Girl soundtrack)
L'appareil a sous - Brigitte Bardot
Blockade - The Rumblers
Fool I Am - Pat Ferguson
No Good Lover - Mickey and Sylvia
Bewildered - Shirley and Lee
Teach Me Tonight - Wanda Jackson
Honey's Lovin' Arms - Robert Mitchum
Ole Devil Moon - Chet Baker
Mack the Knife - Ann-Margret
Yogi - Bill Black Combo
Malambo No 1 - Yma Sumac
Laisse-moi tranquille - Serge Gainsbourg
Dansero - Don Baker Trio
Turquoise - Milt Buckner
Close Your Eyes - Dolores Gray
The Beast - Milt Buckner
Harlem Nocturne - The Viscounts
Whatever Lola Wants - Eartha Kitt
Blues in My Heart - The John Buzon Trio
Honeysuckle Rose - Marlene Dietrich
Do It Again - April Stevens
Give Me Love - Lena Horne
Shangri-la - Spike Jones New Band
Groovy - The Groovers
Suey - Jayne Mansfield
8-Ball - The Hustlers
That's a Pretty Good Love - Big Maybelle
You Can't Stop Her - Bobby Marchan
Sweet Little Pussycat - Andre Williams
Fujiyama Mama - Annisteen Allen
Save It - Mel Robbins
Tall Cool One - The Wailers
One, Two, Let's Rock - Sugar Pie and Pee Wee
Killer - Sparkle Moore
Accentuate the Positive - Bill Black Combo
Go Slow - Julie London
Kiss - Marilyn Monroe
Mondo Moodo - Earls of Suave
Bubble Gum - Brigitte Bardot
The Stripper - John Barry (Beat Girl soundtrack)
13 Men - Ann-Margret
That Makes It - Jayne Mansfield
The Girl Can't Help It - Little Richard
Hound Dog - Little Esther
Jim Dandy - LaVerne Baker
Begin the Beguine - Billy Fury
Mack the Knife - Hildegard Knef
La Javanaise - Juliette Greco
Machins Choses - Serge Gainsbourg
Caravan - The Dell Trio
Czterdziesci Kasztanów (Forty Chestnuts) - Violetta Villas
Lover - Peggy Lee

I realise I haven't posted any samples of the dark art of the titty shaker recently. Let's remedy this right away with this ultra sleazy gem by Andre Williams.

22 December 2010 Christmas Dr Sketchy Set List

/ Because nothing says "Christmas" like Ann-Margret in a leopard skin catsuit ... /

Another night of Christmas-a-go-go! Much as I love it, by now even I am sick of Christmas music! Obviously on Christmas day I’ll be playing some 1950s Christmas lounge and jazz music while pounding back glasses of snowballs and mulled wine – but after that my Christmas compilations are being put on mothballs for twelve months.

This night Dr Sketchy was at probably my favourite of all our venues: the Royal Vauxhall Tavern. It’s long been the home of London’s most cutting edge alternative cabaret club nights (living up to its reputation as a historic music hall venue), and (gratifyingly for a DJ) its sound system is thunderously loud. The RVT was decorated with beautiful Christmas decorations (including big plaster cherubs), with moody atmospheric night club lighting and candles glowing on the tables: think festive but Weimar Republic decadent, as if the seedy nightclub in Josef von Sternberg’s The Blue Angel(1930) was decorated for Christmas. In other words, the perfect locale for Dr Sketchy at Christmas! So I was annoyed when suddenly the houselights were cranked up again just when people were starting to filter in. There also seemed to be a commotion outside, with RVT staff rushing in and out, but I was busy DJ’ing and oblivious. Finally one of the bartenders came over and explained why they’d turned up the lights: there was a bomb scare outside; the surrounding area was taped off while it was being investigated. That’s the kind of news that really jangles your nerves, but we carried on in the British blitz spirit and hoped that we wouldn’t have to cancel, and that people would be able to arrive safely. Mercifully the bomb scare was a false alarm, and the place gradually filled up. We just had to push back the start time from 8:00 pm to 8.30 pm to accommodate late comers.

We had two models: Platinum blonde burlesque starlet Slinky Sparkles (a Dr Sketchy veteran) performed an adorable Christmas-themed striptease number giving new meaning to the concept of “Christmas stocking”. We also had a sinewy male model, Beau Black. The RVT is primarily a LGBT venue, and our shows there tend to get a little raunchier than normal, sometimes featuring full male nudity. At the end of night for the final sketch the two models plus suave emcee Dusty Limits and a member of the audience recreated a kinky, non-traditional (sacrilegious?) nativity scene onstage – for which Beau posed stark naked except for a Santa hat, while I played Wayne Newton belting out “Jingle Bell Rock!” My kind of Christmas!

Doing two sets now of Christmas tunes this month (see my playlist from 6 December 2010) made me realise how many endless versions of “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” and “I’ve Got My Love to Keep Me Warm” I’ve played. Great songs that open themselves to infinite interpretations, but considering the lyrics of neither ever make reference to Christmas, it’s funny how they have been embraced as Christmas standards. (For the record, Julie London’s sloooowed down version of “I’ve Got My Love ...” is the sultriest of all time).

As of the next Dr Sketchy on 8 January 2011, normal musical service will be resumed. In the meantime ... Merry Christmas!

Santa Claus is Comin' to Town / White Christmas - Jimmy McGriff
Winter Wonderland - Chet Baker
Violets for Your Furs - The Continental
Candles Glowing - Marlene Dietrich
Silent Night - Dinah Washington
First Snowfall - The Coctails
Exotic Night - Martin Denny
Let Christmas Ring - The Coolbreezers
What Are You Doing New Year's Eve? Nancy Wilson
My Christmas Prayer - Billy Fury
White Christmas - Elvis Presley
Santa Bring My Baby Back to Me - Mae West
Santa Claus is Sometimes Brown - El Vez
Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Wayne Newton
Jingle All the Way - Lena Horne
I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus / Jingle Bells Bossa Nova - Eddie Dunstedter
Sorry to See You Go - June Christy
Winter Wonderland - Peggy Lee
Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas - Lou Rawls
Let It Snow! Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer - Eddie Dunstedter
Christmas Time is Coming - Stormy Weather
JIngle Bells - The Vel Mares
Merry, Merry, Merry Christmas - Ruby Wright
Santa! Please Don't Pass Me By - Jimmy Donley
Sleigh Bells, Reindeer and Snow - Rita Faye Wilson
I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus - Jimmy McGriff
Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer - Al Martino
Jingle Bells / Jingle Bell Rock - The Hollyridge Strings
Santa Claus is Comin' to Town - Lena Horne
Far Away Christmas Blues - Little Esther
Blues for Christmas - John Lee Hooker
I'd Like You for Christmas - Julie London
Christmas Time Is Here - El Vez
Santa Claus is Back in Town - Mae West
Christmas in Jail - The Youngsters
Ole Santa - Dinah Washington
Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer Mambo - Billy May
Winter Wonderland - Dean Martin
Jingle Bells - Gene Autrey
Fat Daddy - Fat Daddy
Merry Christmas, Baby - Lou Rawls
Nothin' for Christmas - Eartha Kitt
Christmas Kisses - Ray Anthony
I've Got My Love to Keep Me Warm - Julie London
Christmas Wish - El Vez
Blue Christmas - Elvis Presley
Santa Baby - Eartha Kitt (1960s version)
I've Got My Love to Keep Me Warm - Billie Holiday
Warm December - Julie London
Baby It's Cold Outside - Dean Martin
Cha Cha Cha All the Way - Capital Studio Orchestra
The Merriest - June Christy
White Christmas - Peggy Lee
I'll Be Home for Christmas / Baby It's Cold Outside - Jackie Gleason / Jack Marshall
Everybody's Waitin' for the Man with the Bag - Kay Starr
Jingle Bell Rock - Wayne Newton
Christmas Island - Bob Atcher & The Dinning Sisters
I've Got My Love to Keep Me Warm - Sammy Davis Jr and Carmen McRae
This Year's Santa Baby - Eartha Kitt
Santa Claus is Back in Town - Elvis Presley
Frosty the Snowman - The Ventures


/Haunting Christmas scene: pink flamingos in the snow /

Keep up to date with upcoming Dr Sketchy's in the new year here